The Researcher’s Diary and the Farewell of Masks

By SAYEEDIN

 The Researcher’s Diary and the Farewell of Masks


The laboratory is not confined to four walls—

I search for data in their movements, in their speech,

in the silent grammar of emotion and performance.

Their feelings, their behaviors, their carefully staged dramas—

when did I become such a precise reader?


The day they realized I am not naive,

their clever tricks began to collapse into their own deception.

From that moment, the theatre lost its turn,

and voices softened into pleading—


“Lower the heat… don’t write about us anymore.”


The masked ones grew afraid,

running from the mirror they once controlled.


A relative whispered caution into my ear:

“Reading is enough. Stay in your lane.

Don’t entangle yourself in the complexity of people.”


But I only smiled inwardly—

let the masks fall where they must.


The house fell silent at my father’s farewell.

They assumed I would break, become diminished,

that I would quietly inherit absence.


Yet they did not recognize the transformation.

Now I stand in a different

form—

quiet, observant, uncertain whether I am friend or enemy to them.


When I placed their actions under question,

the darkness of their expressions surfaced without disguise.

Where do they hide their faces now, after the shock?


A strange, almost cruel joy exists in this silence—

not of victory, but of revelation.


Those who rely on outward strength are often the weakest within;

fear is a poor currency for power.


Within me lives a small, watchful ghost—

my intelligence, an envoy of truth.

This still observation, this steady and quiet gaze,

has already been understood: this is who I am.


The drama has ended its contract with them,

the illusion has dissolved into air—

and I remain,

the calm age of a continuing chessboard.

Not specified

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